• Increase font size
  • Default font size
  • Decrease font size
Follow me on twitter
Latest Blog Entry
Site Search
Managing Conflict RSS Feed
Home BLOG Category MyBlog
Category >> MyBlog

Marine Scandal & Blood sucking Fiends teach about management

Posted by: Carol in MyBlog

Tagged in: Untagged 

 

Marine (YouTube) Scandal & Blood sucking Fiends Teach About Management

Many of you have seen or heard about You Tube video showing US Marines urinating on bodies.  Marine Corps leadership called the actions "wholly inconsistent with the high standards of conduct and warrior ethos that we have demonstrated throughout our history."  Investigators are trying to determine whether the commanders knew of the misconduct or whether a breakdown in discipline occurred.

For those of you who are in a position of responsibility, look for the lesson here:

THE POLICIES YOU SPOUT ARE WORTHLESS UNLESS FOLLOWED.

PEOPLE WILL DO WHAT THEY WANT IF THEY THINK NO ONE IS LOOKING OR IF THEY THINK YOU WOULD DO THE SAME.

So what does Blood sucking Fiends have to do with this? Plenty. Blood sucking Fiends  is a book by author Christopher Moore (also author of another great management title Practical Demon Keeping). The story revolves around vampires, San Francisco, and a group of employees known as “the Animals.”

The Animals work for Safeway as the night stock crew. Their favorite past time at work, other than getting drunk, is turkey bowling.  According to Wikipedia,

“Turkey bowling is a sport which is based on ordinary bowling: a frozen turkey serves as a bowling ball and 10 plastic bottles of soft drinks or water are the bowling pins. The turkey is bowled down a smooth surface, for example, ice.

What is the link you might be asking between Turkey Bowling and desecrating the dead-lack of supervision, lip service (at best), abandonment (bad) of organizational principles, or a complete “screw you” attitude (very worst).

Take a minute to think about it.  Then step up to the plate and do the right thing.

 

 


When is a victim not really a victim?

Posted by: Carol in MyBlog

Tagged in: Untagged 

When is a victim not really a victim?

 

There I was sitting outside of Whole Foods eating my lunch.  It was a beautiful day.  An older man with 2 miniature pinchers (think very small Doberman ) sat a few tables away.  He seemed to be enjoying the day.  He seemed to be enjoying hanging out with his dogs.  It was all tranquil.

Until...SHE showed up!  The wife. Oh boy, was she steamed.  She was yelling at him. Shaming and Blaming. "Where were you!"  "Why don't you have your cell phone!"  "I have been looking for you!"  "I have been all over!"

I thought "Wow, the poor guy.  He is getting pooped on in public big time."   He looked like a hapless victim.  He acted like one too. Standing up quietly and walking away from the wrath of THE WIFE.

Then I started to reflect on what THE WIFE had said.  During the course of her rant she mentioned that 

  1. She went in look for something that was not there
  2. She went back to where he had dropped her off.
  3. He was not there
  4. She went back into the store to look for him.  Not finding him, she went back to front entrance and waited for him. 
  5. She waited and waited.
  6. She tried calling him. She could not reach him.
  7. She spent 20 minutes searching the store for him.
  8. She decided to shop
  9. She finally found him.
  10. "You ALWAYS do this!!"

It was "You ALWAYS do this" that really got my attention.  I can imagine that THE HUSBAND thought it was a nice idea to go run an errand or two, park the car, take the dogs for a walk then find a pleasant place to sit.  I will bet he thought "she will figure it out."

Now, at the outset HE looked like the VICTIM.  Upon reflection, I had a lot more sympathy for THE WIFE. I mean, how annoying is that behavior.

So here are the morals to this sad tale of The Victim Who is Not A Victim

  • A victim may not be a victim, but an instigator.
  • People can and will follow their own agendas
  • Your agenda may be obvious to you and a mystery to others
  • You need to move forward  or get sucked into the "YOU ALWAYS DO THIS" ridiculousness

I think all THE WIFE, like most of us who feel neglected or victimized, wanted to hear was "I am sorry. I didn't realize the impact on you.  It won't happen again."

Too bad.  I wonder who will get those miniture pinchers in the divorce?


NO Talking!!

Posted by: Carol in MyBlog




So I returned from the Dr.’s office with my RX for antibiotics and strict instructions.
“No Talking.”  
I come back surrounded by the folks who urged, begged me to go to the Dr.  When I said “I am not allowed to talk for the next 36 hours. Then only for my work with a client. Then no more talking until Friday.”  Everyone seemed fine.  Until they needed something…
 
Then my doctor’s directions were irritating. It happened over and over again.  People would come up start talking to me ( not with “yes” or “no” answers, but full sentences and expecting me to answer in full sentences.)

 Everyone knew that there was a RX to help things get better, but everyone fell into their old habit patterns.

Even after the 36 hours with the little reprieve, they still came.  “I thought it was only 36 hours.”  “come on you are OK to talk now.’  (My voice is still hoarse)

 How does this relate to conflict resolution?  Easy.  People may recognize the need to change habit patterns, but once it becomes an effort. They balk. Say that the change really isn’t necessary. (even though 24 hours ago it was)

 

 The result is that there has to be at least 1 person who is stubborn enough to stick to it. Tenaciously stick to it. Until the new way of doing becomes more ingrained.

 


Sue's Tips for Performance Reviews

Posted by: Carol in MyBlog

Tagged in: Leadership

Take the Scary out of performance reviews.

          One of my heroes is Sue Pivetta. Sue started a 911 call center training company. I met her during my work with Pierce County Center for Dispute Resolution. She is a rock star and committed to making the workplace better.

This blog is from her latest newsletter & provides great tips on how to conduct performance reviews so that they are less scary & uncomfortable.

Feel Good Going In

 1. Start with YOU.

You will feel better about giving evaluations if you are not stressed for time. Be prepared and feel good that what you have in your evaluation document is representative of your true measurement. Double check to make sure you aren't evaluating on a) historical perceptions b) rumor c) conjecture d) isolated incidents. And yes - SMILE this is a time to really connect with someone important.

 Know Your Direction

 2. Read Everything

Before you sit down to evaluate someone, read everything you can about their past evaluations, any notes from or to them, their training records. Get a full history of this person in order to know the direction you need this person go.

Be sure to discuss the person's history with them. Some people drag negative history around like a stinky bag of dead fish.

This may be a good time to encourage a new direction. You do that by letting the person open up the bag and have someone really listen. Some people however, love their negativity so often it's important to be very clear about the idea of LETTING GO of historical 'wrongs' and moving forward towards a more peaceful career and more job satisfaction.

 Understand What 

 3. Understand why you are evaluating.

Without good evaluation systems the agency has NO idea what is happening compared to what is 'supposed' to happen with individuals, shifts, the entire agency. Good evals provide responsible supervision and direction.

Also evaluations provide documentation of agency accountability to manage the Center responsibly. Regular evals improve communications and morale. Through evals, the agency can look for common themes and if found can set goals for organizational training.

Evaluations can be pro-active noticing of potentially dangerous practices, methods and habits before they become a problem. Individual evaluations can be used for analysis for future training needs.

 It's All About Me

 4.Time to listen to them.

Typical evaluations may say the evaluator talks, the person being evaluated listens - sign here and don't let the door hit you on your way out.

A productive evaluation allows time for the employee to share, vent, question, advise, offer and feel heard. Now, to feel heard, a person must not feel the evaluator is defensive and can be trusted with very important (to them) private or emotional information.

Let down, let go, allow and relax when listening.

 Because I Said So!

 5. Bring your measurement to the table.

Authentic assessment can only take place after measurement. Authentic assessment takes place repeatedly over a long period of time, not the day before the evaluation. Patterns of success and failure are observed and reported from the work.

Your measurement tool is listening to a series of the person's 'work' on tape - not by osmosis[at work]. Bring the 'work' to the session and study it together. "How do you think you did with this [project]?"

email: sue@911trainer.com

phone: 1.800.830.8228