Conflict Management Strategies eNewsletter
Vol IV, Issue 21, Holiday 2008

• Reading: "For Auld Lang Syne" - Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot?
• Action Tools
• Ask Carol
• That's Worth Repeating
• Recommended Reading
• Where's Carol??

We spend so much of our waking hours at work for it to be an uncomfortable, stressful place. I want to help you bring your best to the workplace and handle sticky situations gracefully and improve your working relationships. These Conflict Management Strategies are intended to help you accomplish that.

"For Auld Lang Syne" - Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot?

As the year comes to a close and the holiday season hits a high gear, I wanted to take a minute to thank you for taking time to learn the life skill that no one ever taught you , but expected you to know - Conflict Resolution.

I am reminded of the traditional Scottish song by Robert Burns "For Auld Lang Syne." In the song Mr. Burns asks us, "Is it appropriate to forget what we learned over the year? Let bygones be bygones?" Well, here is my mediator answer...

"It depends."

Yes, there are times that you simply need to let go of bad feelings, frustration, or "It shouldn’t be like that" resentments, particularly, in circumstances where you have no real power or influence. Trying to assert power in those circumstances is crazy-making for you and annoying for those around you... especially when you spend a lot of time griping about it.

AND, no. "No" because often our conflicts can teach us something about how we view the world, what is important to us, what behaviors we want from others, and what behaviors we expect from ourselves.

So, you may ask, "Is there a magic bullet to determine which stuff should rightfully fall into the 'Should be Forgot' category?"

Nope, life is not that simple.

However, here are some Action Tools that may help you decide if forgetting is appropriate. Take a minute to reflect on each of the following questions. You might be surprised at your responses.

I wish all of you a conflict-free holiday season.

Cheers,

Carol

P.S.  Here is a link to the lyrics of "Auld Lang Syne".

Back to Top

Action Tools

These action tools are designed (I poached them from my friend, colleague, and Business Coach Extraordinaire Ms. Mary Allen )

1. What were your most significant accomplishments in dealing with conflict this year both personally and professionally?
   
   
2. What were your most significant disappointments in dealing with conflict this year both personally and professionally?
   
   
3. What is the one thing that you can stop doing that will make you more effective in dealing with conflict?
   
   
4. What is the one thing that you can start doing that will make you more effective in dealing with conflict?
   
   
5. Do you have any self-limiting beliefs that are preventing you from handling conflict more effectively?

Back to Top

Visit our Resources page for free articles and tips on resolving conflict at work.

Back to Top