Conflict Management Strategies eNewsletter
Vol IV, Issue 16, July 2008

• Reading: Employee Turnover - People leave bosses, not companies
• Action Tools
• Ask Carol
• That's Worth Repeating
• Blog Announcement
• eNews Archive
• Recommended Reading
• Where's Carol??

We spend so much of our waking hours at work for it to be an uncomfortable, stressful place. I want to help you bring your best to the workplace and handle sticky situations gracefully and improve your working relationships. These Conflict Management Strategies are intended to help you accomplish that.

Summer time –Summer time. Time for vacations, conferences, and summer reading.

Here is a quick summer read that is the most downloaded white paper on the Conflict Management Strategies Web Site (YEP!!! There are FREE articles to download. I just posted a new one today! Check it out 10 Well Intentioned Mistakes. See if you or your employer has fallen into these well intentioned traps)

Employee Turnover: "People leave bosses, not companies"

According to a recent Gallup poll, 40% of 1,000,000 individuals surveyed leave a position because of their immediate supervisor.  The survey also found that poorly managed work groups are an average of 50% less productive and 44% less profitable than well managed groups.

So what is an employer to do? First, carefully hire for supervisory positions.  Simply because someone is a good nurse, front desk person, pipe fitter or salesperson does not mean he or she will be a good supervisor. Supervisory skills are separate and distinct from any other job skill.

Once hired provide supervision training. Supervisors must know:

• Needs of Individuals- What are they are & How to support.*
• Employer’s Expectation of Team- How it fits in the overall goals of the operation.
• Scope of Authority-What are the limits.
• Accurate Performance Appraisal- How to do it.
• Strengths and Weaknesses of Team- How to Leverage.
• Legal Duties-What can and cannot be done.

*A recent survey by Badbossology.com revealed that 58% of respondents valued "The ability to bring out the best in people" as the "most important characteristic of a boss."  While "driving for business results" ranked dead last with 2%.

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Action Tools

These action tools are designed to assess if your supervisors have the skills needed to succeed.

• Ask the supervisor where they need support.
• Ask those who are supervised where they would like more support and how the supervisor can give it.
• Follow up!

Easy-Sure. So go forth and do it. You may be surprised by the responses.

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Ask Carol

I regularly field questions from clients and conference participants. You know – those off-to-the-side sort of questions that you are dying to get some feedback on. Here is your chance to pick my brain for FREE. Send me your questions about workplace tension, challenges with working relationships, how to over come bad "Mojo" at work.

Q: Carol, you talk a lot about listening and suspending judgment.  So I am supposed to come to the conversation "raw" and pretend that I don't have a history with this person?

A: Good question. Yes, I highly encourage people to listen and to suspend judgment so that preconceptions about the person or the topic don’t obfuscate the issue. No, you don’t need to pretend that history doesn’t exist.

Instead, be aware of how the history may impede you from understanding and resolving the issues.  Don’t edit who you are. BE who you are and listen.

Carol

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Feedback

I read your newsletter every time it comes and I like the format generally. I am trying to think why it doesn’t really grab me.

I think I finally figured it out.

Human resources and work place conflicts are due to people getting together to do business. It is like carpooling. If the driver is reckless the ride will be difficult not to mention the wear and tear on the occupants and the business/vehicle itself. But if the ride is smooth and deliberate the ride will be successful with pleasant and comfortable occupants.

It is almost as if the part of business is ignored unintentionally. I wonder how many owners come away with this same feeling. Unless a conflict rears its head I am not going to worry about this. It is like business fraud though – only a fraction of the amount that is really going on gets detected and then by accident after a great part of the damage has been done. These are just my thoughts – I may be wrong.

-- DAN

Carol Responds:
Awesome insight. Conflict does lurk under the surface and often goes undetected. AND well run work places often take what goes well for granted.

So let’s take the conversation to a different place. I want to hear from those of you whose workplaces DO handle things well. What are your secrets, tactics, strategies?

Go to my blog "The Work Place Conflict Expert Says" and make your post!

That’s worth repeating…

"While nearly everyone in conflict espouses collaborative values, they nonetheless demonize their opponents and offer excuses for themselves."

--Ken Cloke

Blog Announcement

There are new "The Workplace Conflict Expert Says" blogs. Check them out!  Interesting stuff on Gender and Conflict. Workplace "Crazy Makers at Work", "Avoiding Claims of Sex Harassment", "Work/Life Balance is a Myth!" Check them out. Post your comments. Continue the conversation. Blog >>

eNews Archive

Have you missed an Enews?  Are you a new reader and what even more Action Tools to manage conflict at work and in life? Check out the eNews Archive for past articles and Action Tools.
eNews Archive >>

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Recommended Reading

Mediating Dangerously: The Frontiers of Conflict Resolution
This is a "Bible" for many professional mediators I know. It was sitting on my shelf for a long time. I just cracked it open and loved, loved, loved it. Go out buy it now. It will be illuminating for you in your personal and your professional life.

Excerpt:
"When we mediate dangerously and encourage parties to act on their values, we run the risk of aggravating conflict or blowing it out of proportion. It is easy for parties to rationalize aggression or inaction by demonizing their opponents, to cast themselves as innocent victims acting on principle, and to mistake simple differences for baseness or evil. Most conflicts are petty, personal, and filled with miscommunication, misunderstanding, and missed opportunities for dialogue between well meaning individuals who are rarely as horrible as they are made out to be..."

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Where's Carol???

July 1, 2008 - If you MISSED it. The Audio Conference is for Sale on the PBB Website.
Professional Audio Conferences
Stopping Conflict From Destroying Your Organization-For Your Supervisors
www.pbb.com

August 14, 2008

Washington Employers
No Shouting. No Singing Kumbaya-Mediator Skills for the Executive
Kent, WA
www.wa-emp.com

September  17, 2008

Northwest Human Resource Management Association-Regional Conference
Kennewick, WA
How HR Torpedoes Itself During EEOC Mediations and What To Do About It.
www.nhrma.org

October 15, 2008

American Association of School Personnel-National Conference
Seattle WA
The Roadmap to Resolution for the School HR Professional
www.aaspa.org

Do you want to bring a dynamic speaker to your organization or conference?  Carol is scheduling engagements for 2008. 
Call or email now to bring Carol to you!
(253)219-5532
ContactUs@ManagingConflict.com

Visit our Resources page for free articles and tips on resolving conflict at work.

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