Conflict Management Strategies eNewsletter
Vol IV, Issue 20, December 2008

• Reading: Why the Economic Crisis = More Conflict Among Employees
• Action Tools
• Ask Carol
• That's Worth Repeating
• Recommended Reading
• Where's Carol??

We spend so much of our waking hours at work for it to be an uncomfortable, stressful place. I want to help you bring your best to the workplace and handle sticky situations gracefully and improve your working relationships. These Conflict Management Strategies are intended to help you accomplish that.

Why the Economic Crisis = More Conflict Among Employees

It is official. Recession. But really, who cares that the news today said the "R" word?

Everyone from the CEO’s to the line workers has felt the escalating effects of the economic downturn for months. The workplace tension is so great that it is palpable.

As a result, conflict at work is escalating.

You might be thinking, "Carol, it is ridiculous! Anyone lucky enough to have a job right now should not to be making waves at work. I mean, keep your head down and don’t become an easy target if layoffs are coming!"

Yep, laying low and biding your time might be a strategy. But that is not what is happening.

Why? People cannot easily compartmentalize the stress they feel in their lives –home values decreasing, consumer debt increasing, the stock market in the tank, retirement accounts eviscerated... and let’s not forget about tenuous job security, which for the vast majority of Americans, equals access to health care.

I mean who needs reality TV now? The real life trauma and drama of daily living is enough. However, workers (even more so as managers and leaders) are expected to walk into work "clean" of all emotional baggage and fully engage in the tasks at hand. My colleague, Dana-Victoria, aptly described it as "hanging your heart on the door on the way into the office.”

The personal stress coupled with the economic downturn = more fears and co-workers, subordinates, and superiors freaking out.

It is a lot to go through.

So in the upcoming weeks, expect more tension and blowups at work. Expect these blowups to come at unusual times and in unusual ways. When they do come up, you can say to yourself, "Yeah, that is what Carol was talking about."

Realize that the blowups are just ineffective coping mechanisms for the stress. Also realize that it is okay to call people on inappropriate behavior. Try and be tactful, even if they aren’t. Recognize that people are hurting and coping the best way that they can.

You can also expect some folks to become withdrawn, if not depressed. Again, this may be a coping mechanism - but one that does not help decrease the overall tension and stress of the workplace. Offer support and hold them accountable.

In tough economic times, workplaces MUST be efficient and productive. However, productivity will not happen if people are too stressed to function. So when conflict does break out in the form of arguments, email wars, and strange behavior, move as quickly as possible to acknowledge the stress then get back to work.

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Action Tools

These Action Tools are a combination of Action Tools and Stress Relief Measures.

Stress Relief

This is audio of a REAL voice mail message . It always has me doubled over. Listen and share with your team. Everyone needs a good laugh. It will decrease the tension and get the good hormones running again. Car Wreck Voicemail >>

This is the video that is an excellent example of how one person found a way to manage stress and cope with a very stressful academic environment.  Take a look and brainstorm ways you and your team can blow off some steam. Dancing Cadet >>

Check out these previous enews articles for how to deal with inappropriate feedback and personal attacks.

• Sad (True) Story of a Convenient Victim
• Out of Bounds
• HALT Before Jumping into the Fray
• Dealing with People

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Ask Carol

I regularly field questions from clients and conference participants. You know – those off-to-the-side sort of questions that you are dying to get some feedback on. Here is your chance to pick my brain for FREE. Send me your questions about workplace tension, challenges with working relationships, how to over come bad "Mojo" at work.

Q: Help. I just took over a department and there is a long standing feud between 2 of the employees. Any suggestions on how to address the situation?

A: Yes.  These are the steps to take.

• Meet with each of the employees individually and get their take on the situation.
• Determine if it is a question of a clash of generations, differing communication styles, and/or unrealistic expectations.
• Articulate your expectations as to behavior and roles to the group.
• Encourage the group to say out loud what they want from the work environment.
• Ask the group what respect and teamwork looks like for them. Then seek individual commitment from each to act consistently with what they want to see from the others.
• Finally, if changes in titles or responsibilities need to be made, make them. Conflict is often kept on life support because people are not called on inappropriate behavior consistently. Call people on inappropriate/ineffectual behavior and let them know that you will be watching.

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That’s worth repeating…

"You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometimes
You just might find
You’ll get what you need"
-- Rolling Stones

Recommended Reading

I have three books for you this time. One is on leadership and team building. One is a more spiritual bent. One is more about happiness. Here they are:

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team – A Leadership Fable by Patrick Lencioni. A client of mine recommended this book. I have it sitting on the corner of my desk and can’t wait to start it.

Excerpt: "For all the attention that it has received over the years from scholars, coaches, teachers, and the media, teamwork is as elusive as it has ever been within most organizations. The fact remains that teams, because they are made up of imperfect human beings, are inherently dysfunctional.  But that is not to say that teamwork is doomed. Far from it.  In fact, building a strong team is both possible and remarkably simple. But it is painfully difficult."


The Art of Power by Thich Nhat Hanh. I picked this up at one of my favorite bookstore The Tattered Cover in Denver, Colorado.  Thich Nhat Hanh is a Buddhist monk and peace activist. What drew me to the book was the hopefulness it embodies.

Excerpt: "What does power mean to us? Why are most people willing to do almost anything to get it? Even if we are not aware of it, most of us seek power because we believe that this will enable us to control our life situations. We believe that power will get us what we most want: freedom and happiness."

What Happy Companies Know by Dan Baker. One of my business coaches gave me a copy of "What Happy People Know."  I was playing around of Amazon.com and found this book. Sounds cool; we could use more happy companies.

Excerpt: "Happy companies are pretty down to earth. They see reality clearly, but choose to address it positively. They perceive opportunities, not obstacles and they lead with values, optimism, and fairness. They promote creativity and pragmatism. And they avoid the reactive, unthinking decisions that humans make when they’re driven by pure, animalistic fear."

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Where's Carol???

It is already December and I have begun booking for presentations in 2009.  If you know of organizations, conferences or associations who would benefit from better skills on how to respond to workplace conflict please let me know.

December 17, 2008
Audio Conference - Have YOUR entire team listen in!

Government Leadership - Creating a Calm & Engaged Work Environment in Today’s Economy

Today’s economy is causing dramatic changes in the workplace.  Putting yourself in the driver’s seat or recognizing and reducing conflict will not only provide a happy work environment, but a productive one as well.  You will discover how to:

• Identify and resolve conflict in its early stages
• Implement Action Tools that will get results
• Overcome Listening Blocks, Barriers and Inferences
• Implement a Performance Matrix To Prevent Future Problems
  

www.governmenteducator.com/4J/0

Visit our Resources page for free articles and tips on resolving conflict at work.

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